Specialist uses threat of social services

I have decided to switch pediatric pulmonology specialists.

A few weeks ago I received a call from a nurse from Fairfax Pulmonology (our specialist) relaying a social services threat from Dr. Osborn.

Being threatened by Valentino’s specialist doesn’t seem like a healthy functioning patient/doctor relationship.

Because I had canceled and rescheduled two of Valentino’s visits, Dr. Osborn wanted me to know that if I didn’t bring Valentino in by the end of the week, they would contact social services.

After the fear, anger, frustration AND confusion subsided I tried to share my thoughts on the situation and my decision, as Valentino’s mother, to reschedule his appointment.

Valentino had finished a round of antibiotics and switched to an albuterol MDI inhaler last month and was doing great. Then he got a little fever and sniffles that were not CF related. The fever and sniffles were teething related. Valentino had been up all night and was fussy and the last thing he needed was to be at the specialist being poked and prodded for several hours. So, I decided to cancel and reschedule his appointment. I explained to the receptionist that I was canceling because he was not feeling well due to teething and appointment would probably just be traumatic instead of helpful.

Shortly after I hung up from rescheduling the appointment, I received a call from the nurse threatening to contact social services if I did not bring Valentino in to the specialist.

It is outrageous that this is the state of affairs in the western medical model. Threatening parents instead of having a discussion and voicing their concerns and offering me the opportunity to understand their viewpoint and then share mine, and then perhaps subsequently meet in the middle. Perhaps I would have agreed to take Valentino in to see Dr. Osborn immediately.

The most important issue, for me, is that I am Val’s primary caregiver.

I see him every single day and watch his health closely. I am the mother that knows the difference between a lung infection and my teething baby.

I also have the medical records where Dr. Osborn recorded that I always adhere to the chest PT and medical regimine and seem to be handling the care of Valentino quite well since his diagnosis at 7 weeks old to his current 18 months.

Why then, is Dr. Osborn’s mode of communication to threaten me by relaying a message through a nurse? And why is there no discussion and sharing of viewpoints? No doctor or state agency should be able to force me to parent in a certain manner when it is clear, and I have the medical records that state, that I am a devoted, loving, and competent caretaker for handling my son’s CF?